Finding new paths, forging healthier habits sometimes means grieving the reasons why you created those old ways and old solutions in the first place. Growing up with trauma, hurts and disappointments – no matter what kind – causes one to find ways to cope. Sometimes in ways that seem puzzling or destructive on the outside, but that make perfect sense when you dig a little deeper. But letting go of a pattern or habit requires one to see clearly the why… why you grasp at certain things out of anxiety, why you felt the need to avoid or expect a certain outcome. Why you chose what you did, felt you had to do what you did… at some point we need to let go of these things and stories because they just no longer work. Especially today when things are different and new and yet we keep using the old ways and keep coming up against walls. It’s time to just slow way down and get very present when old habits kick in again. Take a step back and observe why you react the way you do – and breathe instead. Sit in the fires of desire and impatience and edginess and just… wait. For the moment to pass. To stop acting reflexively. And in this little window new solutions will come. Or maybe just stillness, for a little while. Or nothingness. But it’s only in this space where new solutions, new habits can be born. And new beginnings are possible.

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